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Sarcasm Aside

random thoughts of a self-diagnosed neurotic with the attention span of a five-year old... a blog by Alternati

Chickens and Chicken Scratch

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

I am a struggling wannabe vegetarian. I have given up most of red meat (pork and beef) for almost three years now. But I have yet to give up fowl. Chicken may taste boring but it's my only protein source aside from fish. I guess chicken ennui comes from everything else tasting like chicken. "How does it taste like?"... "Like chicken".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Chicky was on the other side. I swear to god that chicken is evil! Evil I tell you! Chicky is the KFC mascot. If you think about it, he's a frickin sell out! He acts all jolly around children, welcoming guests, etc etc. when what he's actually saying is, "I made a deal with Colonel Sanders, as long as you come and eat my brethren, he will not deep fry me! So come on in, eat eat eat!" Don't be fooled by his big innocent looking eyes, his blue bow tie and his striped short pants... That chicken is the feathered Hitler! Pure evil!

How could he possibly do that? Just imagine deep frying Chicken Little... horrible! There should be a Chicken Coalition or something. The holier-than-thou Foghorn Leghorn can chair the committee and Chicken Little can do the PR. Other notable members would include Chicken of Cow and Chicken and the whole cast of Chicken Run.

I guess, What it all boils down to (no pun intended) is the eternal un-answerable question:
Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Did this make any sense at all? The caffeine hasn't kicked in yet. These rantings are a futile attempt at convincing myself not to eat chicken anymore. No chickens were harmed when I wrote this.

Chicken Scratch

What does your handwriting say about YOU?

You plan ahead, and are interested in beauty, design, outward appearance, and symmetry.
You are a shy, idealistic person who does not find it easy to have relationships, especially intimate ones.
You are affectionate, passionate, expressive, and future-oriented.
You are a talkative person, maybe even a busybody!
You enjoy life in your own way and do not depend on the opinions of others.

First of all, my Graphics professor will die if she saw this handwriting (In my defense, I wrote it with a mouse, I almost had Carpal Tunnel trying to maneuver the blasted thing) Ugly handwriting aside, this is amazing! I expected something like, "You should stop wearing that pink jacket" or "You have the tendencies of an axe murderer". The first line is so so true, that's why I became an architect. Line 2 and Line 4 contradict, how can I be shy and talkative at the same time? Talkative probably suits me more. Line 3 is right except for the "future-oriented" part. Right on! (Last line)

Thanks shenski, got this from your blog.

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posted by Alternati, 11:36 AM

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Tap, tap, tap... Afternoon Nap
The Pen is Mightier than the S(poken)word.
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